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- All shirts are Unisex 

- Idea and planning, by Jeff /, at ClothingOnHumans in Orange County, California 

- Illustration by Anna Dittmann in Scotland

 - GOTS Certified, fully traceable 100% organic cotton 

- Free of toxic "forever chemicals"

- Non-bleach Whitened 

- Made by 100% adults and 0% children

- Sewn in Los Angeles by Groceries Apparel

- DTG printing by T-Shirt Storm in California

- Low-cost-to-potentially-free shipping to the "Touching States Of America" via USPS in a 100% recycled box made by EcoEnclose in Colorado

- Directly supports this one-person business and the artists I collaborate with

- Stands up to the wasteful, conventional, fast-fashion clothing industry

- Ready to ship now!


Whimsical Story Text – 

This Bearded Lady stands in a confident posture while nude, looking back at the viewer. Her hair is up, her beard is down, her brows are shaped, and her lashes are long. Her deep brown eyes could contain the depth and complexity of the universe while the esteem of her coiffured hair is simple to grasp. 

She can be seen regularly exposing her entire body to the sun because she's a strong-willed woman that does what she wants when she wants. When clothed she is most likely at one of the three businesses she owns either supporting the staff, designing, or inventing. She's caring, independent, enthusiastic, thoughtful, intelligent, brave, capable, passionate, and much more.

Q: Is there anything this modern woman can't do? 

A: Since she doesn't believe in the word "can't" her mindset is open which makes an excellent foundation for her to fearlessly venture into her unknown and conquer it. 

"Failure is the gravel that surfaces the paths to accomplishment, go forward and pave as much as you can with it." - Bearded Lady


 The Idea –

The idea I had for this design was to take the nude and/or close-to-nude women that were very popular on shirts in the 90's and 00's, and the ones that are still out there these days, and turn it on its head. Back then and now still I don't really understand the desire to wear a shirt or have a sticker somewhere on a car that displays a woman almost nude. Is it cool? Is it tough? Is the what "real men" do? I have no idea. Is a nude woman with a beard helping this ecosystem, probably not, I do think it's confusing the ecosystem though, which is a start I'm content with.

The Illustrator –

This was illustrated by the incredibly talented Anna Dittmann, and I found Anna's art online and was very impressed. I reached out to her by email to see if she would be interested in a project that was a little unlike the art I saw on her site. Back then after sending the email I thought for certain that she would find me and my idea far too absurd. As I waited for a reply I thought I was going to have to find another artist however I didn't search for one; Anna's style for this design was solidified in my mind because I thought it would be best illustrated by her. 

I can remember the feeling I had when I got her email accepting the job. I was sitting on the carpeted floor in my old apartment and very soon after reading that she was a willing participant, not even able to get through the whole email, I sprang up with a huge smile on my face and ran around because I had so much energy. After I calmed down, which took a little while, I read the rest of the email. I then sent her a sketch and a picture of the beard I had in mind. She returned a sketch, I had minor posture adjustments, then later she sent the final art and I was again very energetic, and again impressed by her abilities as an artist. 

In every email interaction we have had Anna has been a delightful human and I am looking very forward to working with her in the hopefully near future. And she doesn't mind my wacky ideas, which is outstanding. 

 From her site: 

Anna is a digital illustrator from San Francisco with a passion for figurative art. She now lives and freelances in beautiful Scotland. Her love for nature and portraiture are recurring themes throughout her work, often drawing inspiration from movement, organic shapes and natural elements. Her work is featured on book covers, comic covers, magazines, advertisements, posters, tattoos and she has exhibited in galleries worldwide.


About The Shirt –

100% Organic Cotton Made By Groceries Apparel and in their words– We manufacture in our own Los Angeles, CA factory to ensure our standards are fully executed. Vertically-integrated, local, and traceable production maximizes quality, efficiency, and employee pay, and minimizes redundancy, waste and our carbon footprint.

DTG printing by T-Shirt Storm in Orange County with water-based inks.

The Shipping Box And What's In It – 

Packing supplies by EcoEnclose and all printing by greenerprinter. Packed by me, and shipped by USPS Priority.


Shipping Time –  

It is my goal to ship shirts as soon after they get ordered as I can, usually on the same day or the subsequent day.